The Journey

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I think it happens at the end of every year when you get some time to wind down and think about what’s happened you begin to see things in a different light. From my reflections, I guess there are a few things that I’d like to share in the hopes that others can take something away or at the very least learn something new.

In a lot of ways, this has been the biggest year in my life so far, I’ve had more challenges to overcome I would have thought possible, but I got there. Some things don’t make sense and never will so it’s easier to just let it go and move on, for me someone that likes to look at things in black and white that was a big curveball.  I’d definitely say that the steep learning curve has taught me at the very least the kind of person I don’t ever want to be and helped me learn who I am.

I’ve learned that you can’t always be alone, I’ve always kept something in reserve and dealt with everything that comes along by myself and that’s something that I have learned the hard way isn’t healthy. Talk to people. Find the few amazing humans that make your life great and let them be a part of it, sharing isn’t always a burden, sometimes talking through something allows you to see it in a different light and for the weight to lift a little. It’s easy for me to get caught up in my own thoughts and begin to shut everyone and everything out.

On the other side of that, I’ve learned that not everyone is looking out for you. Some people will always have their own priorities and if they can benefit from anything they will. Essentially people can be shitty, but that doesn’t mean that they can’t also be great.

Rest and look after yourself, this is something that I have a tendency to ignore when things become a bit complicated I’ve always compartmentalized and moved on, and lo and behold it always catches up to you and then you have to deal with everything at once, trust me that’s definitely not ideal.

The biggest thing I’ve taken from this year is to get out and adventure, make new memories, explore new places and don’t forget that there’s always somewhere new to go, or somewhere that you have already been that might just be what you need. You only regret the things you didn’t do when it comes to the end of the day and the world is an amazingly beautiful place and that no matter the situation nature will always help to heal your soul.

I’d like to take a moment and just say thank you to the amazing people in my life, I don’t have the words to express how thankful I am but I definitely wouldn’t be where I am today without the support and belief of you beautiful humans. I am looking forward to all the new memories that are coming.

So for 2017, you’ve been a hell of a year but I am glad you’re nearly over!

Obi out.

 

The Words We Say

‘It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words, like ‘What about lunch?’’

Winnie The Pooh

 I think the power of words has been grossly underestimated throughout the development and growth of our society. When you have spoken words that require some justification I believe that the intent of a promise or statement has been lost in quite a few ways. It is rare now for individuals to keep the word of what they say or have a clear meaning to something that they have spoken without a thought of how they can manipulate the result.

With a society where it is common for individuals to go hours or days without having a conversation to anyone else or hide behind computer screen or mobile phones to interact I think the biggest questions is what do words mean to you?

I have always believed that being true to your word is one of the most important things that you could possibly do, in my experience this isn’t something that is universally held but in a lot of ways I believe is linked to the integrity of an individual. On more than one occasion I have been questioned about the reasoning for me believing the best in people. The simple answer to this is that I believe the word of others. To live in a world where questioning everything that has been spoken or questioning every person’s motives is not something that I would be happy to contribute to. If that means I get to be surprised at who is true to their word, then I guess I hope that I am surprised often.

The affect that our words have on others is something that not many people stop to think about very often, for some people the simplest words of encouragement on a dark day can mean the difference between feeling alone or being hopeful about what tomorrow will bring. Be considerate and remember; You never know how long your words will stay in someone’s head after you’ve spoken them.

The simplistic views of Winnie the Pooh is something that I am more than happy to adopt into my everyday life and I think that a lot of people could benefit from. Use simple words, be kind and truthful to others, live with hope and love and most importantly always be there for your friends.

 

 

Regression to the Mean

I like to believe that this is a philosophy that can be counted on. I guess it’s something that you learn over a long period of time that isn’t subjective to the current position that you are in… Which quite frankly doesn’t help at this current moment for a lot of people but hear me out.

What does it mean? It means that things always average out.

If everything seems to be going wrong for a period of time then there has to be a light at the end of the tunnel, and things at the very least have to return to being okay. Alternatively, and the negative side of this theory out in the universe is that things can only go right for so long, but hey no one ever complains when everything is going right do they?

I like to believe that there is a positive in every situation. I mean in physics it is impossible for a negative to exist without a positive so that bodes well for us. I guess what I am getting at with this is that things can always get better, I say can because a lot of the time it really comes down to us to make things better. If something is wrong, making you unhappy or just a bad situation then there isn’t anything that should stop us from walking away.

I am not the poster child for making great decisions when it comes to my personal life at all and there’s been a hell of a lot of times where walking away from a relationship or situation that was negative probably would have saved a lot of pain, time and money but I guess that is the beauty of hindsight. If you take one thing from any of this it’s you can always change your position in what is happening whether directly or even a mindset. If something doesn’t work or isn’t working it is literally the definition of stupidity to keep doing the same thing and expecting a different result, isn’t it?  So why do we do it? Personally, for me it’s probably stubbornness and the fact that I try to see the best in people at all times two things that aren’t a great combination in a lot of situations.

For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.

What is the best action for you?

 

Obi

OHANA

‘Black as night, bright as day,

In the dark I found my way.

With a friend throughout the night,

The moon shone the brightest light.

The darkness called the brightness dimmed,

Throughout that time you stood fast my friend.’

Throughout life we all face our own struggles. The difference between moving on and being dragged down is the burden that we share. I have had the privilege in my life of having an incredible support base that no matter the burden, they are there. This post is a recognition and appreciation, without you I would not be who I am today.

Family is the words I describe to explain the relationships in my life because that is how I define them. Each individual is someone that I couldn’t imagine my life without. They are selfless and caring and would not hesitate to be there when you need. A large part of these friendships have been formed in a brotherhood that few can understand but many respect, others I have stumbled onto in various periods throughout my life, I am attempting to explain some things that I value highly. My period in the military taught me many invaluable things about relationships and others I have learned from trial by fire, I am not perfect in any sense of the word and I’ve failed at all types of relationships at one time or the other so take from this what you will. This is a subject that can be expanded on and written about for an unspeakable amount of time but I am going to try and narrow it down to three key things I value.

The first is loyalty this is probably the most important and the rarest attribute to find today. That even if someone doesn’t understand, they are there no matter what. When things go wrong this is something that is irreplaceable.

The second is Selflessness; putting others before yourself is a rare quality that is severely underrated in a society that most are out for themselves and what they can gain even in their personal relationships, how are you supposed to survive unless someone cares enough to put you before themselves? Sometimes all you need is to know that someone cares enough to stop what they are doing and just take a moment to be there.

The third is integrity; to be or have someone that is unwavering in their principles or views can be a blessing or a curse in many ways but I choose this over the selfishness and unprincipled nature of humanity any day. It is an important attribute for having the people in your life that will call you on your shit. I know a lot of the time I need this more than anything else, I need that outside advice to understand a situation, an action or reaction that has happened that makes zero sense to me could be something that someone else can explain in a few simple words.

These three things are something that I try to incorporate into my life on a daily basis and it is something I look for in cultivating relationships with other people and the older that I get and the more time that I spend with other people I recognise how rare these qualities actually are. The attributes are not mutually exclusive to those that have served but it is something that in my opinion those individuals have an easier time adjusting to or personifying.

This post is some thoughts that I’ve put together but the biggest thing is a massive thank you to those that read this, to those that I know and I define as family I appreciate you more than I can ever say. Whenever I have needed you, you have been there and on that note whenever you need I will be too.

OHANA

Obi

 

 

The Beginning

The beginning,

There are those that search night and day, who look in each moment for words or for a sign that can help to explain their lives. They look for strength, for hope and the ability to just carry on. Will things get better? Does True love exist? Is there a bigger picture to this crazy ride that is life? We all search for the big picture for the moments that make our lives have a greater meaning or for things to make sense.

Some find the faith and clarity in religion, others in music or artwork but for me I find this clarity in words. It is my hope that like me and so many others that someone will find strength from these words, or maybe it just fits a piece into the puzzle that they are struggling with. If it gives someone an idea to put their own words into something then that is the best intention we could have. I believe that the written word has the ability to affect the lives of millions. Writing can give the pause to consider the action and reaction of many. In a world that is filled with so much ignorance the opening of any single mind is an amazing thing.

For these and many other reasons we will record our writing, adventures and anything that happens to give us a thought to add to this blog in the hopes that we can change at least one life for the better!

 

This is the beginning of an adventure and like any adventure the best place is always the start!

 

Obi